Looking back, I still can’t find the humor in a relationship disaster story. I did have some really bad dates, which I would not consider “relationships”, but will share one here anyway. It happened over 25 years ago but will be forever ingrained in my memory.
My date shows up at my apartment, I open the door to find the person standing there is shorter than me, and I am only 5′ 2″. First thought that runs through my mind is I am going to kill the person that set us up who told me “he isn’t that short, and you’re short anyway, so I’m sure it will be ok.” I invite him in while I get my coat and he is visually taking in my apartment and asks, “You live alone?” (The alone was said in an incredulous manner) Uh, yes, thinking to myself, I’m 31, not so strange. But I reply with, ” Yes, I do.” He then asks, “Who cooks for you?” At which point I am ready to take off my coat and tell him the date is over. Who cooks for me???? What planet was this guy living on? Maybe his mother was still cooking for him, I don’t know. We get in the car and the guy proceeds to drive recklessly and well over the speed limit, weaving in and out of traffic for the next half hour. We go to a small restaurant, where he decides we should just order a drink and appetizer. I have no recollection of any conversation except when we finished our appetizers he asked for the check and then proceeded to ask me to pay for my half. In retrospect it is kind of funny in a crazy way, and makes me thankful everyday for my husband having rescued me from more disasters like this.